Destination Unknown...

Upon finishing the book "Loose Girl: a memoir of promiscuity" I see the things that matter the most, the little things that show you, more than those times of utter frustration, the person you're with true feelings. The last page and a half of this book made me feel more confident in everything I have with my boyfriend. Basically the last page and a half summed up she meets a girl in Portland that she holds off on having sex with, because she's maturing. They end up getting married. (Yay, there is hope!) Shortly after her wedding she's at a bar with some friends to see a band. A guy at the other side of the bar catches her eye. They don't talk but just exchange looks for an hour before she decides she should leave... That's when he approaches her and introduces himself, and she hurries the conversation along and says that she's married. She leaves in a hurry and heads home where her husband is asleep. She thinks about how he always told her "we'll be fine." and is unsure of herself.

"I climb into bed, and half-asleep he rolls toward me. He slips an arm around my middle and nuzzles his face into my neck. I close my eyes and listen to him breathing. How lovely that sound is. Maybe, I think, I don't have to be great at this; maybe I just have to be good enough." (210)

That paragraph put everything into perspective for me. I don't have to be perfect, I don't have to be every other girl, in fact its fantastic that I'm not and I am good enough. He is with me and that's where we both want to be. I don't want that to change. There will always be frustrations and arguments, we're only human after all and everyone has their flaws. But when we love someone you take everything; the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly. You won't always want to deal with all of those things, but the fact that you do shows where your heart is really at. I can bitch and complain about the things he does all day (and I will, I'm a woman for god-sake that's what we're pros at.)  but I would be lost and stuck without him in my life. Crazy? Maybe, but hey who's not a little crazy in this world.

 "The day Leif arrives, I'm ecstatic. I can't wait to get my arms around him, to get him near me. I pace my room, making myself wait to take my shower and get ready. It would be unbearable to be dressed too early. I try to read, but I can't keep the sentences in my head." (157)

This perfectly describes the madness I used to go through, but when you stay together all that excitement or stress kind of just disappears, which I'm okay with...  I just want to have my jaw dropping moments every once in awhile. :) I have some ideas on how to go about this... so we shall see how things go. FYI that book is amazing and I strongly recommend it.