I love him... i swear i do. Sometimes, I know i just talked about the frustration and how we put up with it when we love someone... but whats the limit? Sometimes i don't know if i'm trying to convince myself or everyone else... or maybe even just him. It kills me, how i can go out of my way to be everything someone could possibly want or need, and they still just diss you constantly. I put on a happy face when i go out into the world. Say how wonderful my boyfriend is and how i am so lucky to have, which is true sometimes... but other times, i just can't stand the abuse. The sad part i don't even know if he knows he's doing it. I mean, he should, but does he? I tell him he needs to be nicer, i leave or i get frustrated and mad at him... but nothing changes. I know that if i leave him, he won't fight for me to come back, which is partially why i don't... but its not really fair to me is it? i just would like to have the same respect that i at the very least attempt to show him. or an invite to go out with him somewhere, anywhere... guess its not cool to drag around your lame underage pissy average girlfriend. who knows... oh well for once i'm being summoned, i'm sure i'll write more later.
.... i love him.... i swear i do.... don't i?
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